SLOW DOWN, RELAX & STOP NEGATIVE SELF TALK!

For the past 10 years I have been on the go, on the go, on the go all over again! I’ve tried to impress my neurotypical friends and peers but seriously I have overworked myself over these past ten years that I had the consequences of my own actions 4 years ago. Back in 2016 I suffered from lightheadedness, got checked by the doctor twice regarding this and I been sent to the ENT clinic to check if I have an inner ear infection but nothing was shown of it. Then a couple of months later the lightheadedness happens again and again. I went to my GP and got diagnosed with GAD (Generalised Anxiety Disorder) after I had an intense feeling of lightheadedness that I ended up in tears. After the diagnoses, my doctor has put me on citalopram which is a form of SSRI (Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor) antidepressants. I gone off them on August 2019 and went back on them this month because my feelings of anxiety just returned with the vegenance and it was like that since October.

During my time in the past ten years I never allowed myself to sit down and relax, even if I do then I would want to get out and do something. I been through courses after courses and courses, now I hit the brick wall because of fatigue. The problem was that I overworked myself that much that I want to prove myself to my neurotypical peers and employers out there that I am very capable. During my times in education, I always beat myself up because I was finding it hard to find new friends, I always tried to step out of my own shadow but it’s so exhausting that I hit the brick wall many times. During my times in a community college out of town, I denied being autistic to my friends in fear of rejection because the neurotypical individuals always seperate the neurodivergents to the neurotypicals because of their “limitations”. I developed masking skills without knowing what masking is, I felt sickened because masking is an exhausting process to deal with. You have to copy other people and take their attitudes and stuff like that but still be yourself. Masking is very exhausting, it took a massive toll on me physically and mentally.

During this lockdown period, despite my worry of the future after COVID19. I took the moment to sit down, relax and reflect on myself. I took the time to slow it all down, relax and stop this negative self talk. I need to go from “I am not good enough” to “I am good enough and I will prove that I am”. I think it’s near time to take the mask off but I will do that slowly. This is not going to be easy but I will get there.

Changes

Hi all,

Apologies with the lack of content on here. I was doing the videos on the YouTube platform with social media inputs. Anyway, here’s the rundown.

I am going to recreate the site as well as creating an email address to allow for collabration with other neurodivergent advocates around the world. The more we work together, the better the outcome for the neurodiversity movement fully! I am going to take the time to implement subtitles for the videos for the hard of hearing or those who are deaf.

I will also make approaches to Neurodivergent communities/advocates and individuals to collabrate and make projects to work with one another in the global way. As for the blog site, I will make investments at the end of the summer period to have the full domain name.

How to protest against TikTok

The Autism challenge is something that many of us are trying to fight because it’s taking a huge impact on not just the emotional health but the mental health of all autistic individuals and their families. Autism Challenge is cyberbullying to the masses, it’s bringing out the nasty stigma that we’re trying to fight for many years.

If you would like to do your part, please consider using them as a protest.

If you’re not using TikTok, delete the app and leave a review. That’s the best way to express out information to them and they’ll see it as a protest.

If you’re going to use it then please report the ones who are doing the challenge. Ideally we want a big as protest as we can have to ensure that everyone stops doing the challenge to take steps to protect our community at this time.

Update on May

Apologies to everyone. I am neglecting my blog. Recently I am trying to build up my YouTube channel to expand out my experiences. While everything is easier on video I can honestly say that the videos are tough going.

I will get back to doing this and I will also look to expand on the social media as well as this blog so this won’t be all neglected.

Update

I am not going to follow the schedule and I won’t be making a new one as I feel that I am doing posts and videos anyway even though I was doing the videos more last week. So there will be more posts and videos.

How I Feel about YouTube

I used to do YouTube in the gaming space wanting to be the another Syndicate Project and all these other gaming stars but it was cut short with the way I handled my channel. Now with the lessons learnt I know how to manage the whole experience better, yes I could have make a couple of mistakes on the way but this is normal. I used to get very bad hate comments and comments that are all negative then good. Some people were saying that the content is shite or I muffle through my words. Oh I need to pay for the best premium equipment as I can. Here’s the thing, I could have become better off if I would have stayed and ignored everything. That for an autistic person can be very hard but as people we need to remember that the haters don’t live with us. They don’t know us, they were not our friends, they don’t our battles and they don’t even know where we live!

So how do we deal with them, we ignore them! Easier said then done but that’s the way they can grow your content because you’re showing everybody that you’re far more thicker skinned then the idiots. Most of all jealousy fuels them because they may have a shit life, they probably won’t have what you have or they don’t have the money or support to do what they want to do. Best of all, kill them with kindness. Ignore them. Don’t react to them. I feel better now managing YouTube and I don’t have any haters. When I cancelled my last channel, that was many many years ago.

Why am I Taking Long to Launch a Podcast?

Why am I taking long to launch a podcast? Here’s the answer I am filling in information into a blank word document trying to figure what would should I say in it because there is quite a lot of information that I want to say but I don’t want to bore potential listeners. Yes I may have 77 followers in Facebook, 98 followers on Twitter, unknown on Instagram because I barely use it and 1 subscriber on YouTube, yes YouTube is only new in this activism but still I wouldn’t want to put information in and have a complete boredom of a podcast but this is happening either way.

Why I Am Against Zero-Hour Contracts?

This is the long hitting problem with autistic people and those with learning difficulties. Most of us apply for jobs and hope to be accepted. I always apply for jobs and I mostly hear no reply, some cases I get accepted for an interview. Then after the interview I hear nothing, altough I did apply for a job at a local barber shop which is front of house staff with chances for getting trained as a barber. I applied for the job, then got an interview. That was a first time I got proper good feedback but the issue is that there was someone who got the job because of experience.

I know there are people who I know who have autism and a specfic learning difficulties who got jobs. They have a zero hour contract and the issue is the employer will provide little hours or no hours, some of them may be good employers and give you a good working hours that match what you need. There is a lot of fears with neurotypical people who has zero hour contracts and I am sure that the fear is amplified for neurodivergent. We shouldn’t settle for zero hour contracts but then again keep the job but fight for a proper contract that will enable security in the job.

The Vaccine Myth

So Vaccines cause autism. WRONG! It was a very common myth that vaccines causes autism. Donald Trump even said about vaccines causing Autism which the scientists are saying that it isn’t. It came from birth. It’s a neurological difference from neurotypical borns. In my opinion, those who think it came from vaccines should be ashamed of themselves because there is no proof that it was caused by vaccines.

It would be very risky to take off vaccines as the vaccines are here to prevent major illnesses that causes lifelong disabiling illnesses. I watched a video of a man stuck in the iron lung who is the one of the last surviving polio victims. The Iron Lung is also known as a drinker tank that is a negative type of ventilator, very rare machinary but if the right wing politicians think it’s ok to take people off vaccines then the autism diagnoses would not change and it would lead to an issue with children catching illness that causes them to get very bad illnesses or worse.

Autistic people like us get enough discrimination and the vaccine argument is stupid. The vaccine argument is a load of false information. I was going to have the “The Vaccine Bullsh1t Myth” as the title but I didn’t want to offend those who doesn’t swear. I think with balanced thinking it could really cause people to accept people like us and try to erase the social stigma but then again its the long fight, it will be a long fight but we need to silence the false of information that vaccines causes autism.

Autism and Social Media

Social media can be a very wonderful thing but at the same time too it could be the thing that would paint a bad picture of you. We all do good things and bad things on social media, we all do things that are questionable and we all get into undesirable fallouts with friends or other people in that matter.

As an autistic person I always fall into the nasty trap of overthinking that people could be judging my posts or frowning upon them. I had friends that have parents who couldn’t wait to taint me under a bad and questionable name because I am being my own person, I am doing well in my education and I don’t have a strict upbringing. With being autistic and having an anxiety disorder, it’s sometimes very easy to get into the trap of thinking that you’ve done a lot of things wrong.

There are a couple of tips –

1 – Limit your time on social media (especially in this time). There is such a thing as too much.

2 – Don’t partake or engage on any conflicts. Conflicts can get you into a nasty state. I had been in arguments so many times on social media. Facebook and Twitter can get you in sticky points, just post something that you want but be mindful.

3 – Many many many conspiracy theorists are breeding on social media talking about vaccines and how 5G is proven to hurt people. Vaccines DO NOT cause Autism. This will be another post and video for another time but IT DOES NOT CAUSE autism. 5G, if you don’t believe then you’re probably wise. Just believe in something trusted, and if you don’t trust it don’t read it but keep mindful that this is a dangerous time and it’s helpful to take in account on what’s going on rather then following theories that are not true.

These tips will help you. More tips are on the way and how I used social media in the correct way with minimal hassle or arguments.